Fic: The House Guest

[jess-d-10.livejournal.com]

Title: The House Guest

Author: jess_d_10 

Fandom: Shelter

Rating: R

Pairing; Characters: Zach/Shaun; Gabe, Cody

Chapter: 5/9

Summary: Gabe needs help more than he ever has before, and Zach and Shaun step up to the plate.

Notes: This is a multi-chaptered story, but I've already completed writing the whole thing, so I should be posting chapters fairly quickly. I had so much fun writing this ... I hope you'll all have fun reading it!

Previous Chapters:

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four



New Chapter:

Chapter Five



Zach


Zach’s Monday sucked. There was no better way of putting it: he was having a terrible day. This was really unfortunate, because his weekend had been amazing. Saturday night was more fun than he had even anticipated: he hadn’t been out with friends until all hours for what felt like a very long time, and it had been a memorable night. The evening was spent with new friends, whom he felt like he had known for years, his oldest friend, who was like a brother to him, and the love of his life. Gabe had seemed to like his new friends, and his new friends seemed to like Gabe, so Zach could not have been more pleased. On Sunday, they all slept in, and then spent the afternoon at the beach, surfing and relaxing, and the evening barbequing at home.


Monday, though, was not so fun. In his eight o’clock seminar class, they were supposed to be discussing how Andy Warhol’s sexuality influenced his work, a subject that Zach was actually looking forward to hearing about, but their infamously self-centered prof decided, unsurprisingly, to spend the two hours talking about herself. She talked about her years of fame as a painter had meant a stressful life involving much travelling, which had eventually led to her divorce from her husband. This, of course, made Zach think about Shaun and his upcoming trip.


Zach felt guilty for wishing Shaun would not go. He knew how good this was for Shaun’s career, and a part of him really was excited for his partner. He also knew that Shaun’s success meant more financial security for their family, and though money wasn’t everything, nor was it the only reason to be happy about this opportunity for Shaun, Zach understood very well how much of a toll never having enough money could take on a family. But what other tolls could this kind of success take? Zach was not only concerned about this particular tour; he was thinking about the future as well. If Shaun’s next book did take off and he became more a well-known writer, he would be required to do more tours, and be away from their family more regularly. He didn’t want to think about how hard that would be, or what it could do to the two of them, not to mention Cody, who had already been abandoned by one parent.


After his morning class, he met with another of his instructors to discuss an internship Zach was considering doing at an art gallery in L.A. The instructor, Michael, was part-owner of the gallery, and told Zach that he could intern there two nights a week, if he wished. The internship would not be paid, so Zach was trying to decide whether or not it would be worth spending the time away from home.


“I guess what I’m wondering is, what kind of opportunities could this lead to?” Zach asked.


Michael shrugged. “Like any other internship, it’s something to put on your résumé. You’ll get to meet some people in the industry, and see how artists get accepted into shows.”


“Could it help me get into a show?”


Michael frowned at him. “Zach, we don’t accept artists for our shows because they worked for us. We accept artists when their art impresses us.”


“Oh, right, of course. But … it helps to meet people, right?”


“I suppose. Really, though, the best way to get your work noticed is to continue to work on it, improve it, and then you can try to submit it to galleries. Be prepared to face a lot of rejection, though.”


“So, what are you saying? Do you think that in terms of advancing my art career, I should spend my time working on my own stuff, rather than working in a gallery?”


Michael uncrossed his legs, and then re-crossed them so the other leg was on top. “Well, Zach, that all depends on what kind of a career you expect to have. If you think you are among the tiny fraction of individuals who are able to make a living off of their art, then by all means, devote your time to your painting. However, in the more likely case that you are among those individuals who do their art alongside of a more lucrative career elsewhere, I would suggest spending your time trying to assure that this career is at least in the art industry rather than, say, in a diner flipping burgers.” He gave Zach a smile that seemed to mock him.


Zach nodded. “Right, well, I mean, I guess it’s a great opportunity.”


“Hey now, Zach, don’t look so discouraged. When I say that you are unlikely to make a living off of your art, I don’t mean you personally. Your work is very promising. I’m just being realistic here—I’m trying to tell it to you like it is. And the reality is that almost no one has success as an artist. Some of your other instructors may want to convince you otherwise, but I would rather tell you the truth. Trust me, I’ve been there. That is why I own a gallery, and I teach art to others. I may not make a living off of my own craft, but I am still in the art world, and I am glad for it. And let me tell you, I had to work my ass off just to get to where I am today.”


Zach nodded again, not exactly feeling encouraged by this little pep talk. What it seemed like he was being told was that he would probably never have a career doing his art, but if he was really lucky, he might have a career that he didn’t necessarily love, but that was at least art-adjacent. “Would you mind if I thought about it a little more? I want to talk to my boyfriend about it. We have a kid, so me being out two nights a week is kind of—”


Michael threw his hands in the air. “Sure, I understand. I can’t promise you that someone else won’t take the position while you’re busy thinking.”


“Well, I guess I’ll take that risk. I’ll try to let you know soon.”


Michael smiled again, that subtly mocking smile. “No problem, Zach. And hey, if this doesn’t work out, there are always jobs available at art stores, right?”



That school is full of rich kid painters and they’re all going to end up working at art stores anyways. “I guess so,” Zach said.


He left Michael’s office trying to remember how he felt Saturday night when he was with his friends and the world seemed full of possibilities.


After school, he had work at the café. Normally, Zach liked working there, and didn’t mind the occasional rude customer much. Today, though, his patience was thin. His annoyance built as customers asked why their drinks were taking so long to make, changed their mind as to what they wanted at the last minute, and asked him to do things that were physically impossible. When a customer picked up her latte, took a sip, and said, “Oh, is this just a latte? I meant to order a mocha. Can you make me a mocha?” Zach resisted the urge to hurl the hot drink back in the girl’s face. Instead, he wordlessly took the drink back and made her a mocha. He should have warned her that next time, she should be careful to order the right drink since a mocha cost more than a latte, but he didn’t trust himself to do so with a shred of politeness.


When the rush died down, and Zach busied himself with cleaning up his bar area, his co-worker, Andrea, came up to him with her arms crossed. “OK, mister, what is up with you?”


Zach glanced at her quickly, then returned back to the counter he was thoroughly scrubbing. “What do you mean?”
“You’ve been in a bad mood all day. What’s wrong?”


“I’m fine. I’m just tired, I guess.”


Andrea was not one to take no for an answer. “Is everything all right on the home front? How’s it going with your friend living there?”


“Great. It’s going great.”


“And how’s Cody? How’s his surfing coming along?”


“Swimmingly. He’s getting really good.”


“And what about Shaun? Are you two still all happy and in love and all that shit?”


“More and more each day.”


“Well, then, what’s your problem? Because it seems to me, you’ve got it pretty damn good.”


Zach stopped scrubbing and looked at her. He liked Andrea: she often reminded him of Tori. She was right, of course, he did have it pretty damn good. His life was better than ever, and he was letting worries about the future put him in a bad mood. He felt that Andrea needed some kind of an answer, though. “Shaun just found out he’s going to be away for a whole month. I guess I’m a little down about that.”


“Away doing what?”


“A book tour. He’s going to be doing readings across the country of his first book so that he can promote his next book that’s coming out in the fall.”


“Well, that’s kind of great, isn’t it?”


Zach nodded. “Yeah, it is, and I’m really happy for him. But a whole month is going to be tough. I mean, I have school, and I have work, and then there’s this internship I might do … it’s going to be hard to add taking care of Cody alone on top of that.”


“But you won’t be alone, right? You’ve got your friend there to help you out.”


“I can’t ask him to babysit. That’s not his responsibility.”


Andrea rolled her eyes. “You know, I have a feeling he might disagree if you said that to him. You need to get better at accepting help from other people.”


“Maybe. But still, what about the future? What about when Shaun has to go on a tour, and Gabe isn’t around to help out?”


“So now you’re worrying about something that might not even happen? You need to chill out, man. I’m sure you can work something out if that happens.”


Zach nodded. “Sure. I guess we will.”


For the rest of the day, he tried to show Andrea that he was in a better mood, but he didn’t feel any better. Shaun was still leaving, and his future was just as uncertain and it seemed, career-wise, at least, just as unpromising. As he spent the afternoon cleaning tables, doing dishes, and having his patience tested by picky customers, he wondered if this was his future. He thought about the lives of everyone else in his family, at the careers they had had, and wondered if his would be the same. Maybe he would be like his father and work in construction, or like his mother, and work in a grocery store check-out lane, or like his sister, jumping around to whichever shitty job she could hold on to for more than a month. Or maybe, he would just keep doing this, serving people coffee, and trying to act cheerful. On a good day, that prospect actually didn’t sound half bad. Today, it sounded like a death sentence.


He was beginning to wonder why he had gone through all the trouble of getting back into Cal Arts anyways. He was having a great time, of course, and learning a lot, but what was the point if it would just lead him right back where he started? Maybe he should have just stuck to his street art, and accepted the life that was clearly meant for him. After all, he still had Shaun and Cody, and they were all that really mattered.


That night, Zach had planned to talk to Shaun about the prospect of him taking the internship at the gallery, but then decided otherwise. Zach’s time was already stretched as it was, and he didn’t see the point in stretching it further in order to spend time on something that probably would not lead to anything helpful. It was better that he tried to make as much time as possible for Cody, especially with Shaun’s upcoming departure.


When Zach got home that evening, he tried to hide his bad mood from everyone else. As he and Shaun got into bed that night and shut off the lights, though, Shaun stopped Zach as he reached to pull him closer. “Hold on,” Shaun murmured, “I want to talk to you.”


Zach wasn’t going to lie: he was disappointed. “What?”


“I just want to know what’s going on with you. You’ve been grumpy ever since you got home.”


Zach realized that he was obviously not as good at hiding his mood as he thought he was. “I’m OK. Just a crappy day at work, I guess.”


“What happened?”


“Nothing. I just had an off day. It was busy and I was letting annoying customers get to me.”


“You know, if you’re unhappy with your job, you don’t have to stay there.”


Shaun always seemed convinced that the solution to any problem was so simple: if you don’t like your job, just quit; if you wanted something, just take it. Zach, however, did not see things that way. He didn’t just quit jobs the moment he was bored of them. “I just had a bad day, Shaun. I’m not going to quit because I had a bad day.”


“OK. I’m only reminding you that you always have options.”


Zach sighed. He knew better than to argue with Shaun about this one. “Yeah, OK, I know. Now, are we done talking?”


“I don’t know, are we? Are you sure there isn’t something else bugging you?”


“Yes. Everything’s fine.”


“Are you upset that I’m leaving in April?”


Zach suppressed a groan of frustration. He didn’t feel like talking, and Shaun seemed to always feel like talking. Problems had to be faced head-on, and he would not rest until they were out in the open. He tried to answer Shaun’s question with patience that would satisfy his prodding. “Yeah, I’m a little worried about you being gone for a whole month, but it’s no big deal. I’m really just happy for you.”


“Babe, I appreciate that, I do. But you know, it would be completely understandable if a part of you didn’t want me to go. I mean, I’m not even sure how much I want to be gone for that long.”


“Well, you have to do it, right? This is your big break.”


Shaun chuckled. “Yeah, I guess so. But I still won’t do it if you’re not one hundred percent OK with it. Your happiness is more important to me than my career.”


“Shaun, I love you, but my happiness is not totally dependent on you being by my side at every second.”


Shaun gave Zach’s hand a squeeze. “I know, but that doesn’t mean that being apart for a whole month won’t have some effect on your happiness.”


“I already told you, I am happy. I’m happy for you, and happy you’re getting this opportunity. I’ll miss you, but I’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.”


Shaun sighed. “OK, I believe you.”


“So are we finally done talking?”


“Yes, I guess we are.”


And then for a little while, Zach felt a whole lot better.





Gabe


Gabe was pretty impressed with himself. He had been working at Swell/Snow/Sidewalk for over a month, and so far, he had managed to not fuck it up. He was never late and never missed a day, he was good at talking to customers, and knew all about the products they carried. He had even started to learn a little about snowboarding. Equally as impressive to himself was the fact that though his attraction to Sara had not lessened in the slightest, he had managed to resist the urge to ask her out. This particular accomplishment, though not very enjoyable, felt necessary.
In mid-February, he reduced his hours at the shop slightly and started going to school part-time. The classes he was taking were boring Gen. Eds, but he pushed himself to do well in them. He was mildly surprised to discover that when he actually applied himself, he was pretty damn smart.


On a warm Friday evening, Gabe sat outside with his best friend, sipping a beer, feeling better than he had in months. “Have I mentioned that I love Fridays? Because I really love Fridays,” he announced.


“Don’t you have work tomorrow?” Zach asked.


“Yeah, but my work is the shit. It doesn’t even feel like work.”


“Lucky you.”


Gabe looked over at him. “I thought you liked working at that café.”


Zach shrugged. “I used to. I mean, I still do, sometimes. It’s fine for now, anyways.”


“Whatever, man. Work isn’t everything, right?”


At this, Zach grinned. “Right. So let’s not talk about work. Let’s just sit here.”


“Agreed.”


The two friends sat in a comfortable silence for a brief time, before Zach broke it with: “So, I have to ask …”


Gabe looked at him. “Ask me what?”


“You’ve been living here for almost two months now, and I can’t help but notice that you have not brought up what I thought was your favorite topic of conversation once.”


“And what, do you presume, is my favorite topic of conversation?”


Zach smirked. “Pussy, of course. In two whole months, you have not brought up pussy once.”


“Bring up pussy with you guys? Yeah, right. That may be my favorite topic of conversation, but I know it isn’t yours, or Shaun’s.”


“Come on, man, when has that ever stopped you before? I mean, for example, you met my friend, Allie, and you didn’t say a single word about how hot she is. And before you say anything, being gay does not stop me from seeing the obvious, which is that Allie’s body is smoking.”


“I didn’t notice.”


“Shut the fuck up, of course you did. You can’t tell me that you didn’t notice her, or any other girl since you’ve lived here. I know you haven’t taken anyone back here, and it doesn’t seem like you’ve spent the night anywhere else, which makes me think that you haven’t gotten laid in almost two months. That must be some kind of record for you.”


Gabe shrugged. “Maybe. So what? I don’t have to bang someone a minimum number of times a month in order to survive. I can take a break.”


“Um, hello? Is this Gabe I’m talking to? I mean, I’ve seen the girls you work with, and you’re trying to tell me that you haven’t at least thought about making a move on one of them?” Gabe couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. Oh yes, he had thought about it all right.


Zach did not fail to notice. “Aha! So there is someone! Come on, who is she, and why haven’t you been talking non-stop about trying to get into her pants?”


Gabe rolled his eyes. “I told you, I’m taking a break.”


“But there is someone, right?”


Gabe sighed. “Yeah, there is. It’s this chick, Sara. She’s got red hair and she’s just … she’s really cool.”
Zach frowned at him. “So what the fuck is the problem? Why don’t you go for it?”


“It’s complicated.”


“What is? What are you not telling me?”


Gabe looked down at his beer bottle and started picking at the label. Zach already knew enough about how he had fucked up last quarter, he hadn’t wanted him to know about this as well. This was what he was really ashamed of; this was where he knew he had really fucked up. He felt like he couldn’t lie to his oldest friend, though, and just hoped that he would understand. “Something happened last semester,” Gabe started, “something that I haven’t told you yet. I’m not exactly proud of it.”


Zach straightened up in his chair, suddenly serious. “What is it? You know I won’t judge, man.”


Gabe nodded. “I know. It still isn’t easy to say.” He took a deep breath. “So you know my roommate Kyle I mentioned? Well, me and him used to kick it all the time—we were pretty tight. So, in the fall, he started dating this chick, Jen, and man, he would not shut up about her. All he wanted to talk about was how awesome she was, and how he respected her more than any other chick he’s been with, and how they were waiting to sleep together because, he said, they wanted it to mean something. Me and the other guys we hung out with, though, thought he was pussy-whipped, and thought this chick was just trying to control our buddy’s life. So one night, we all went out together and got trashed—all of us except for Kyle, that is, who was out with his girl—and I decide to make this stupid bet with the guys. I bet them that Jen is not the innocent angel Kyle thinks she is, and that she has an inner-whore who’s just begging to get out.” Gabe stopped for a moment, and took a swig of his beer. He realized, as he retold this story, how much of a douche he sounded like. “So the bet is that I can get Jen to sleep with me before she sleeps with Kyle. And guess what? I won. I won the stupid fucking bet. I tricked Jen into thinking Kyle had invited her over to the apartment, when it was really me. When she arrived, I pretended there was some kind of a mix-up, but asked her in for a drink anyways. An hour later, I had screwed her, and, little did I know, screwed myself over as well.”


Zach, who had listened to Gabe’s story silently, and not changing the expression on his face, said, “So what happened?”


“All hell broke loose is what happened. Jen broke up with Kyle and told him that she and I had ‘made love’. Kyle went ballistic, and tried to throw me out of the apartment. Jen clung to me and kept trying to tell Kyle that we couldn’t help being in love with each other. I told Jen that I didn’t love her, that I had only slept with her because I wanted to prove that she was being fake with Kyle. Then Jen went ballistic, and started ranting about I had broken her heart, and that she hoped I rotted in hell. I went out alone that night and got plastered—that was the night I got arrested, by the way. And the rest is history: I got out as quick as I could, and came here to try to put my shitty self back together again. So, now you know how much of an asshole I really am.”


Zach shook his head. “Come on, man, it’s obvious you know you made a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes.”


“Fuck, yeah, I know I made a mistake. It was a fucking huge mistake. I mean, what was I thinking? I had this idea that I was pulling some funny little prank, but any idiot could see that I what I was really doing was fucking with people’s lives. What the hell is wrong with me that I didn’t see that before? Why am I such a dick?”


Zach was still looking at him. He hadn’t turned away, or reprimanded Gabe for his selfishness. “Gabe, the fact that you feel bad about this shows that you’re not a dick. Yeah, you fucked up, but you’re making up for it now. Call Kyle, tell him you’re sorry. Enough time has passed now, I’m sure he’ll have cooled down.”


“Yeah, right. You don’t know Kyle.”


“Maybe not, but I know it’ll make you feel better if you can put this behind you.”


“I guess.”


A moment of silence passed, before Zach said, “So is this why you won’t ask this Sara chick out? Because you’re guilty about what happened with Kyle and Jen?”


“Yeah.”


“You do realize that Sara has nothing to do with that, right? And that punishing her by ignoring her when you actually like her doesn’t help anything?”


Gabe rolled his eyes. “I don’t think I’m punishing her.”


“Fine, so, you’re punishing yourself.”


“I guess I am. And I deserve it, don’t I?”


Zach shook his head. “Fuck, no. What good is that going to do? Look, man, this past two months has been a whole new beginning for you, right? Getting a job, getting your grades back up—it’s all good stuff, right? So, why not add to the good stuff by going for this chick?”


“I don’t know, man. I don’t know if I’m up for it.”


Zach was quiet for a moment as he looked at Gabe. He could see the wheels turning in Zach’s head as he tried to formulate what he was going to say next. “Listen, man, I don’t want this to sound cheesy or anything, but … take it from me, being in love can make your life so much better. It sort of opens your eyes, makes you want to be a better person. And letting a chance at love slip away can be something you’ll always regret.”


Gabe smirked. “Sorry, man, but that was fucking cheesy.”


Zach gave him a gentle punch in the arm. “Hey, I’m trying to be serious here.”


“I know,” Gabe said with a sigh, “I know. Look, I’ll think about it, OK?”


“OK,” Zach said. After that, the subject was thankfully changed, but Gabe had not been lying: he did think about it. He thought a lot about dating Sara, and whether or not it really was a good idea. He had never been the relationship guy, and if anything was going to happen between him and Sara, it would be a real, committed relationship, not just a casual fuck. The question was, could he actually pull off a relationship? He wasn’t sure, and he didn’t want to treat Sara like his guinea pig. He had screwed with people enough lately.


He thought about what Zach had said as well, though, about what a difference love can make in your life. In the past, Gabe might have dismissed advice like that as sappy Hollywood-induced crap that didn’t really mean anything. He knew where Zach was coming from when he said it, though, and he had seen the proof of it. He had seen how both his best friend and his brother had changed in the year that they had been together. They seemed to have both changed in different ways, but the most notable one was how happy they both seemed. Their lives may not always be perfect, but Gabe was blown away each day by seeing how much happiness, peace, and comfort those two guys gave each other. So, he decided, a chance at that seemed worth going for.